Tag: car

A few months ago, after learning that I couldn’t sell Mitra,* I came across this brilliant idea: to spend less money at the garage, I’ll do my own car maintenance!** “What a brilliant idea,” my brain had thought. I’ve always liked to do practical things like fixing, constructing, etc., and now I shall be covered in oil and dust, and expecting a few bruises. Brilliant. But then…I didn’t. I got lazy.

*you should already know who Mitra is. If not, you’ll find more on older posts.
**now, if you did not know who Mitra was, this phrase gave it away, didn’t it? Blast, now you won’t read other posts. Oh well.

Seagulls. They’re cute. The way they step on the dirt, topi-topi,* simulating raindrops for the worms to pop out. Cute. But I used to hate them. HATE THEM with a passion. I would wash my car (Mitra, the Mini**) and the motherfraking*** seagulls would poop my car into a gooey white mountain.

After a few attempts at keeping Mitra in its glorious shiny electric blue, I noticed breadcrumbs… Breadcrumbs? BREADCRUMBS. Breadcrumbs were all over my car, on a few other cars, on the road and on the pavement.

It was my neighbour. She throws bread out of her window to feed the seagulls. Now I’m parking somewhere else.

*according to someone special, “topi-topi” is a Russian onomatopoeic way of describing the way toddlers walk. Are you picturing it? Yeah, cute topi-topi.
**Check post further down about Mitra
***https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r7KcpgQKo2I&t=49s

I have a blue Mini. I bought this blue Mini on a whim. It’s very much a cancer in my life at this point—his name is Mitra.* Mitra was born in 2005 and I paid £2500 for him. Since then, I have paid another ~£3000 in many fixings, replacements and assorted tweaking. I want Mitra out of my life. I tried selling Mitra but, because it’s still on finance, I can’t.

So now, Mitra is in the rain, with an expired MOT, insurance due to expire next month, waiting for a lock-up garage so I can stop paying its road tax. Hopefully, I will finish paying Mitra’s loan in December and sell it or scrap it for good.

This is a lesson to be learned today. Never buy a car without a thorough inspection. Never buy a car when you actually don’t need it. And finally, never buy a car. You have legs. But maybe you don’t—in which case, I don’t know what to say. I’m sorry.

*Mitra is the Portuguese equivalent of the British “NED”. You know what a NED is, right?